Behavior is a learned skill. Just like you child comes home with a homework that needs to be done, discipline is a skill that needs to be taught and practiced.  I am trained in the Suzuki method. According to the Suzuki ideas, a child should develop a beautiful heart before developing a beautiful sound. Character is more important than anything else!

When I started teaching I was very focused on techniques, posture and musical elements. After all, this was my training. A couple of years into teaching I started thinking much more about the children I was teaching and not what I was teaching them. I realized that I am not teaching music but I am teaching THE CHILD.  Right after that, somehow my whole practice became so much easier. Naturally all musical aspects started following into place both with my private Suzuki violin students and with my public school kids with different socio-economics.

So how do you actively work on a child’s character in a positive way? Here are two ideas with simple examples.

Positive Reinforcement

Learning Through Games

The main idea: Children by imitating the environment they live in.

Getting creative with games can be the best tool for parents. Create games that develop character and classroom behavior. Have your child see it as a challenge, not a chore. Your child will see the behavior correction as a positive thing and will cooperate more. “Practicing the game” will also provide repetition to reinforce the skill you want o develop. Here is just one suggestion for a game.

Your child wins stickers every time they show a good behavior in class and at home. This may be being quiet in class, saying thank you to the teacher after a lesson, congratulating another student, helping with house chores, etc. At the end of the month, count the stickers your child gets. Depending on the number of stickers they have received, they can get different rewards.You can also “up the game” by having your child be more independent when thinking about their own behavior. You can have them recognize when they have done something good. Again, the assignments could be being polite, following parents directions, never saying no to a parent, etc. Have something tasty that can only be used for “good behavior reward”. Have your child get the tasty treat themselves every time they recognize they have done something good. Once a week, meet and talk about the success you’ve had.